


A Bra Mination

by Snarkoleptic



Series: Other Bits and Bobs [5]
Category: Dragon Age
Genre: Crack, Gen, Humor, Parody
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-12-23
Updated: 2011-12-23
Packaged: 2017-10-27 22:55:03
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 673
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/300944
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Snarkoleptic/pseuds/Snarkoleptic
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The tables have really turned on our poor unfortunate desire demon.</p>
            </blockquote>





	A Bra Mination

**Author's Note:**

> Follows closely on the heels of _Support Magic_ , but I don't even…

Treachery!

Shag had to be the _only_ spirit in the Fade to have been fooled in this way! And it wasn't like out in the _world_ , where people could _hide_ it sometimes. Oh, no. If the other desire girls didn't pick up on it right away, Mistress Musk was _sure_ to know the minute she came by for the world-dusk inspection. All those mages, slumbering away, and she just didn't _know_ if she'd be able to lure one in _now_!

Such cruel irony the Fade had forced upon her fate. Like, woe. Despair, okay? She had _such_ an entry for her diary right now, but that _bitch_ Caress stole it and spread her secrets around the vanity to all the other girls. If she _ever_ got a foothold in the world she _swore_ she would drown herself from the shame of it all.

It just wasn't _fair!_

All Whisper said before she _cracked_ up laughing was that the smirk on that woman's face should have been a _clue_ , but it wasn't as if Mistress Musk _ever_ said anything about backing _down_. And she couldn't stop _thinking_ about it all _day_ , and now it was almost _night_ again and there was nothing she could _do_!

So there she was, right, waiting for a demon under the harsh glow of the Fade lamp at the corner, and along came this _evil_ witch who made Shag think her day had been _made_. It was written _all_ over her face that she would have, like, _no_ problem making a deal with a demon, but Shag had been _smart_! She had remembered the _whole_ time to call herself a spirit!

And then the witch said what she wanted was _power_. That was, like, _awesome_ , because power was _totally_ number one on the list of easy things to do and she wasn't really into the girl mages _anyway_. She had the _whole_ Fade to draw on, so it wasn't like she even had to _think_ about feeding some of it to someone out in the _world_ all the time. Like, _natch._

So Shag wound up her pitch and, like, pitched, because she _so_ completely wanted a ride out of this _drag_. Just let a little bit of me come with your power, she said, and I'll give you all you want! And then the witch had, like, _totally_ seen it when her Fade-forsaken pasty popped off and floated down to the ground _again_!

And it wasn't like she should be _bothered_ , because it was painfully obvious this witch just didn't _like_ her in that way, which was _fine_ with her because all she was giving was power, _anyway_. But _now_ she had to scramble in a _totally_ unsexy way to put the damn thing back _on_ before the scary eee essarby called out the nipple Nazis.

And the _whole_ time the witch was _laughing_ at her, until she looked down her ugly human nose and said 'twould seem she had a better offer than hosting the Fade to _get_ the Fade, the _snob_. But when she offered to teach Shag a spell to keep the pasties on and _maybe_ help with the sash around her waist to stop the eee essarby screaming for the gyno Gestapo, the demon had to _think_.

And it was like Mistress Musk always _said_ , that when they stop to think you've got them, only _Shag_ was thinking now, and the _witch_ got her! The bitch hitched _right_ on to that connection to the Fade so she could _suck_ out her power whenever she wanted, and then she _laughed_ again and it wasn't like the deal was even _complete_ except Shag had let her guard down so now she was, like, _possessed_ or something.

And _just_ when Shag opened her mouth to say hey what about our _deal_ , the bitch woke _up_!

 _Fade_ it just wasn't _fair!_ Maybe it was, like, _best_ or something that she didn't write this down. If the other girls could die of laughing they _totally_ would have al _ready_.

 _**Augh!** _


End file.
